Posted in Family, Personal life

A Good Excuse To Eat Maltesers

Every winter, the same discussion:

Me: “When I came home today, there were 6 lights left on around the house.  Why can’t you ever turn off a light? The electricity bill is quite high enough without wasting it.”

Him: “Don’t waste your time worrying about the lights.  Why do you keep leaving heaters on?”

Me: “To stop it getting cold.  To keep the house aired.  To prevent those black spots growing in cold corners.”

Him:  “If you want to keep the electricity bill down, turn off the heaters.  These low energy lights cost next to nothing to run.  It’s keeping the heaters on that costs the money.”

Me:”Yes, but if you leave enough lights on, that will cost a lot too.”

Him:  “Nowhere near as much as the heaters.”

And so on… These discussions in themselves must be energy saving, because we both feel quite heated by the end of them (though I have yet to find a way of making them generate light as well).

But it occurs to me later, (and far too late to count as a witty, argument-winning riposte), that if you follow his logic, you can create a convincing reason for not worrying about eating small chocolates.  Because it’s only the jumbo Toblerones that are going to make me fat.  The odd Malteser is as nothing – as are five, or six, or seven…

A delayed, but a worthwhile, victory.


Author of warm, witty and gently funny fiction and non-fiction, including the popular Sophie Sayers Village Mystery series, beginning with "Best Murder in Show", inspired by her life in an English Cotswold community, short stories and essays about country life. As Commissioning Editor for the Alliance of Independent Authors' Advice Centre, she writes guidebooks authors. She speaks at many literature festivals and writing events, and is part of BBC Radio Gloucestershire's monthly Book Club broadcast. She is founder and director of the free Hawkesbury Upton Literature Festival which takes place in April, a member of the Romantic Novelists' Association, and an ambassador for children's reading charity Read for Good and the Type 1 diabetes charity JDRF.

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