Posted in Family, Personal life

Let them eat toast!

apricot and raisin toast
Image by penguincakes via Flickr

I don’t know why I am so averse to buying toasters.  But the fact is that for a number of years I’ve been eking out other people’s cast-offs, rather than invest in a new one.   As my mother progressed to a four-slice machine, we stuck with her old two-slicer.  Sprinting up and down the kitchen to reload the thing every few minutes whenever the three of us were having a toast-themed breakfast, I must have burned off enough calories to cancel out my consumption of at least the crusts.

It was not my fault that the toaster lives so far from the kettle – blame the electrician who sited the sockets in my cottage so eccentrically.  But it dawned on me eventually that promotion to a four-slice toaster would save me an awful lot of time and trouble.

I therefore declared the demise of my old white two-slice toaster and  decided to splash out (not literally – although that certainly have hastened its end).

I thought choosing its successor would be a simple task.  Surely there can only be so many variations on a theme, even in the ever-growing Argos catalogue?  But no.  There was page after page of the toaster and its cousins, with mind-boggling, unheard-of (by me) features now apparently all the rage.  A toaster that changes colour at the same speed as the bread? A little annexe in which one can simultaneously boil an egg?  Bun-warming attachment, anyone?  This decision was going to take longer than I thought.

Eventually I settled for a shiny new aluminium one which offered all sorts of extras that I didn’t know until now that I’d needed.  The bagel feature, for example, handily toasts just one side of the slice – ideal for muffins and teacakes.  The optional “reheat” button is brilliant on a school day, when my complicated early morning choreography means I’m never in the kitchen when the toast pops up. The subsequent quick blast is just enough to ensure effective butter-melting – the hallmark of a perfect slice of toast.

Before my purchase, toast in my household had become a snack of last resort, I so hated using my naff old two-slicer.  But now my microwave hardly ever gets a look-in.  When the cupboard is bare, its my multi-tasking toaster that comes to the rescue.  Hungry, are they?  Then let them eat toast!

Post-script: I still retain a strong allegiance to another small electric kitchen device eloquently referred to recently by a Malapropian relative as “The George Formby Grill”.  Now there’s a gadget to conjure with – hot food and ukelele tunes at a single stroke.  What’s not to like?

One thought on “Let them eat toast!

  1. You dishearten me. I have held onto the belief that the English only eat toast cold – even passed it down to my daughter. Now I am afraid to take her traveling to see all the untruths…..

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